he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
My bed smells like the plague
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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