I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
There r osticjed everywhere
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
