Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
What a dumb baby whore.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
