so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
