p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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