Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
