The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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