he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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