Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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