On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
