Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize