come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize