I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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