Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
