Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I'm at about main and main street
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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