This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
