we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
