Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
