she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
