i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Randomize
