so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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