He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
