hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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