YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Randomize
