who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize