DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
