forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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