We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
