he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Randomize
