I skipped work to stalk him.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
