As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
