If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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