I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Randomize