so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
