Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
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