We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
