Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
