Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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