i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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