So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
