we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
