i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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