you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
