My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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