She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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