how can u be prego again
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Randomize
