Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize