I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
