Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
