Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
