i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
